jesus

Jesus, Interrupted: Revealing the Hidden Contradictions in the Bible (And Why We Don't Know About Them)
$15.99
This is the fifth book I have read by Bart Ehrman. I enjoy his level-headed historical examinations of the biblical texts which have played such an influential role in our society and his willingness, over the years, to allow his own beliefs to be shaped by the truths he discoveries in his inquiries.

Jesus Action Figure Deluxe
$14.99
I bought this action figure for my nephew a while back. I been givin him presents and bein extra nice to him, tryin to get him over bein scared of me ever since I snuck into his room one night and dismembered his toy monkey with a kitchen knife (long story ...). He was pretty tormatized by the whole event and I thought givin him somethin to do with Jesus would show him how sorry and refirmed I was.

At first my nephew liked the gift, but it seemed like havin the Deluxe Jesus round his other toys took the fun outta playin. His favorite thing used to be to play with his GI Joe action figures, but after the Deluxe Jesus came on the scene none of his GI Joes would hold onto their little plastic guns anymore. They just kept fallin outta their little plastic hands. I think the GI Joes all felt remoose and guilt for shootin at folks with Jesus watchin. It surprises me that Jesus wouldn't even want GI Joe to shoot at Cobra? If Cobra don't deserve shootin than I don't know a soul in this world what does, but I ain't gonna argue with the Deluxe son of God.

With the fun taken out of GI Joes, my nephew started to feel a little scared and guilty. He felt like he needed to play somethin more wholesome to keep Deluxe Jesus from sendin him to Deluxe hell. He tried playin Barbies with the neighbor girl, but she sent him away real quick. Seems they couldn't figure out anything for Barbie and Ken to do together that didn't feel shameful with Deluxe Jesus watchin. Plus, all the tables and displays in the Barbie mall kept gettin tipped over somehow.

With all the trouble, there were a couple advantages of this toy though. First, I thought for sure those little loafs and fishies were gonna get lost within a day or two, but they're all over the place now. There's gotta be thousands of them strewn all across the trailer. Second, I accidentally cut the ear off of my nephew's stuffed Care Bear that night I snuck in for the monkey, but it was unexplicterably reattached the day after Deluxe Jesus arrived.

I don't know how my nephew's gonna survive the puberties though with Deluxe Jesus in his room. They say kids is healthy if they do some "body exploring" on their own when they start to get the puberties, but I don't see how that's gonna work with Deluxe Jesus in the room. Expecially since he's got them glowin green hands like the emperor in them Star Wars movies. I'd be afeared that the second I started gettin a Deluxe Chubby, Jesus would zap me with some Sith-like electric shock. That's enough to make a fella think a lot about baseball when he's in bed.

I thought I was bein smart buyin the Deluxe Jesus instead of just the regular Jesus. Now they'll probably come out with the Ultimate Jesus and we'll all have Jesus envy again. They can keep the whole marketing machine churnin out Jesus merchandise for years with things like Tickle-me-Jesus, Rebuke-me-Jesus, Malibu Jesus, Baby-Jesus-weeps-alot, Extreme Flavor Savior, The Passionfruit Bubblegum of the Christ, and the Crucifabulous Messiah and his Resurexellent host of angels. I think I'd rather collect the Star Wars merchandise.

Jesus
$19.98
This movie has been translated in very many different languages and has been used as a tool to help present The Gospel to many peoples in many nations. This is the best film I've seen concerning the life of Christ and it was filmed on location in Israel as well. It makes a great gift and one that encourages and uplifts (giving hope for today as well as tomorrow).

Jesus: Uncovering the Life, Teachings, and Relevance of a Religious Revolutionary
$14.99
jesusneverexisted(dot)com has all the documentation you will ever need to free yourself from this blissfull myth.