The Wicker Man

The Wicker Man (2006) (Rated and Unrated) [Blu-ray]
$16.99
Have you ever had those moments in life in which you see a film years ago and you thought it was okay back then, but then when you watch it again it sucks? That's what happened when I watched this film. I thought it was okay three years ago, but then I watched it again and realized that it was a truly bad horror/suspense film. Now I have raved about a number of films that I think people unfairly victimize for being different, but sadly, this film isn't one of those films. This is a laughably bad horror film that has to be witnessed to be believed at how shoddy this film is.
WHAT IT'S ABOUT: The film starts off with the main character Edward Malus (Played by washed up actor Nicholas Cage) and a car crash which leaves him depressed. But then out of the blue, he receives a letter his ex-fiancee named Willow who wants him to come to an island known as Summersisle, in which she claims that her daughter; Rowan; who is allegedly Edward's daughter as well has been kidnapped by the cult that runs the island. So Edward travels to the island to find out what has happened to Rowan and uncovers a sinister plot full of lies, and there is no escaping from it.
MUSIC: It's a shame that such a good musical score was wasted for such an awful film. The music excels and is well-composed (Unlike the film) which is why I think it should have been used for a much better film.
ACTION: This film is boring and is certainly not scary. The only shocking part about this film is the ending (Which is on side A of the disc because of the alternate ending), but other than that this film is a complete mess. The script is a ham-fisted, worthless effort that goes nowhere and doesn't come together. It's a grungy, disjointed mess. Most of the film is Nicholas Cage wandering aimlessly throughout the island continuously asking about Rowan and no one bothers to answer him. This film has no suspense involved because you don't care what happens, and you'll never root for Nicholas Cage. This film fails spectacularly as a horror film and as a suspense film.
ACTING: This was just appalling. Nicholas Cage puts on a horrendous performance as a cop. He seems bored and makes his performance even worse with laughable dialogue that is never believable. Everyone else puts on terrible performances as well and you're not scared of them as a cult, they just look and sound ridiculous (Wait till you see Sister Summersisle's face paint for the festival, it looks like face paint they use at football games). But then again, I don't know whether to blame the actors themselves, or this horrendous script. Most likely it's both.
OVERALL: The only way anyone will ever enjoy this film is in a B-movie way. Everything about this film is laughably bad (A cult obsessed with bees?) from its ludicrous and disjointed plot, to the terrible acting, and to the laughable dialogue, this film is sure-fire miss. If for some reason you want to see this film, only rent it. This might appeal to some, but for everyone else, you should just avoid it. If you want a good horror film about a crazy cult that's actually scary, I suggest you try the superb Silent Hill instead of this tripe. No wonder this was voted as being one of the worst horror remakes of all time.
THE GOOD: Good music, some nice set designs, and the alternate ending was weird.
THE BAD: Ham-fisted script that goes nowhere, horrendous acting and dialogue, it's completely boring, it's not scary, and it's not suspenseful.

The Wicker Man: A Novel
$13.95
I am a great fan of the Original Wickerman and while this book offers some more details and perhaps makes Howie more human - not that I think his character needed it, It certainly could not capture the allure of Willow or the Sinister dark seductive air of Lord Summersile.

The ending could never have the impact on paper that it does have on film as it it the shock of the sight of the Acutal Wickerman from Howies point of view that is starkly horifying..

Howie at the very end of the book did something I do not not remember noticing in the movie and I need to check it out to see if I missed something. About the birds being liberated to God---It seemed to be more of a victory for howie then the stunning emptiness that the movie seemed to present. Al least I have a reason to the the movie again---I never forget about it for long---

The Wicker Man (Two-Disc Special Edition)
$14.98
"WICKERMAN" (1973)

The "Citizen Kane" of horror films. Edward Woodward is upstanding, decent Police Sergeant Neil Howie, an English outsider who flies in to investigate the disappearance of a 12 year old girl on Summerisle off the West coast of Scotland. His world is slowly turned upside down as he plunges ever deeper into the primitive, nature worshipping community only to discover the missing girl is the bait and he is the prey. A paranoid, occult thriller featuring Chrisopher Lee as Lord Summerisle and an au naturelle Britt Ekland. Directed by Robin Hardy from a masterful screenplay by Anthony Schaffer.

It is highly ironic that local churches offer "Harvest Festivals" in lieu of more disturbing Halloween parties for their youth, when in fact it was the pagan harvest rites that often included blood sacrifices! (R, widescreen, 104 minutes,)

The Wicker Man
$14.98

Genre: Horror
Rating: R
Release Date: 6-JAN-2009
Media Type: DVD